Safety Third v3 - Unisex T-Shirt Size:L is the clothing equivalent of

is the clothing equivalent of a hostage reading their own ransom note in two accents

Bowling alleys like this one held suburban communities together long before anyone needed an app

Naming a fake beer after him is less a joke and more a historically accurate label

Mixed drinks about feelings is just therapy with better garnish and worse health outcomes

it became the kind of place where a burger and a shake meant everything was going to be alright

Safety Third v3 - Unisex T-Shirt Size:L is the clothing equivalent ofDemoting safety to third place behind a lit firework and a claw hammer is less a priority list and more a discharge summary. Somewhere an ER nurse just felt a chill and doesn't know why. The Details: Distressed white arched slab serif text reads "SAFETY" above "THIRD" in two stacked lines. Below, a cartoon lit firework shell wrapped in red, blue, and yellow stands upright on a red base, its fuse visibly burning, beside a claw hammer with a gray head